3.2: Key Steps to a Great Marriage Proposal

"fall on your knees" - the proposal as event

It's not that I did it wrong. Asking the woman you love to marry you can never be considered 'wrong.' I did not, however, do it in the most romantic, thoughtful and unique way possible - thus providing my wife with a warm tingle in the years to come whenever she thought of it. So learn from an old sinner and "do as I say, not as I do".

When I asked my wife to marry me, I only managed (barely) to include two of the five prime ingredients listed below. For years of fond, romantic remembrances – and the luxury of not having her "remind" you of what a complete and utter failure your proposal was whenever what someone else who did it "the right way" (i.e. better than you) is discussed  – please pay attention to The Five Necessary Elements of a Successful, Romantic Proposal listed below.

They are, in no particular order of importance:

·         Sentiment

·         Elegance

·         Romance

·         Uniqueness

·         Timing

sentiment

Try to ask her in such a way that it involves something that has meaning for the BOTH of you. By that I mean that, unless she's last year's North American Call Champion, asking her to be yours forever in a duck blind in November probably isn't the best idea.

Something that always works is involving an aspect of when, where and how the two of you first met. And if, for some reason, you think that involves a trip to the junkyard in order to unearth and acquire the back seat of your father's 2007 Chrysler LeBaron, well, then, to each his own.

elegance

This relates to the setting. Hopefully it will be beautiful and someplace that she loves to be - i.e. a great restaurant or a scenic overlook at sunset or both. Or, if she technically shouldn't be wearing white at the wedding, perhaps even a sunrise.

schwing time! Chances are pretty good in this sexually liberated country of ours that – unless you live in Amish Country – you're going to be 'gettin' some' after you pop the question. So if you want to make the memory extra special, rent a nice hotel room with a scenic view or a fireplace in advance. That way, you can retreat to it after the prelims are over. This will rack up points BIG TIME.

romance

Sure, get down on one knee. In front of a lot of other people is nice, too. (They can be subpoenaed later on to give depositions.)  And no one ever went wrong with flowers, chocolate, candle light, ocean sunsets, near a roaring fire, or any scenario that involves moon and/or star-light. If you can also do it in such a way that she looks and feels extra good (all 'dolled up' and in a nice dress), you score extra bonus points as well.

uniqueness

A girl likes to feel special. Think about the problem and see if you can combine all the elements above in such a way as to make the event totally unique to the two of you. If she knows or figures out that you're asking her just like your Cousin Fred asked his wife, then the impact won't be ruined, but it will be somewhat diminished.

timing

The Universe, if nothing else, is a supreme practical joker. If you get all of the above absolutely perfect, but have left to chance something that might go wrong, then, as Mr. Murphy will be happy to tell you, it will. Therefore, take a moment. Situational awareness is key. Think about what else might be going on and minimize the chances for bad things to happen during the event.

You don't want someone or something else stealing your freshly-minted fiancee's thunder. For instance, don't plan to ask her on the same day that her sister decides to have that huge nose wart removed – you know, the one that you’ve been trying not to stare at whenever you have to talk to her? Even such an innocent-sounding scenario can lead to a tainted anything-that-can-go-wrong-will-go-wrong memory.